You’re more than your heartbreak.
Heartbreak. Something that everyone goes through in their lives. Regardless of how many people tell you it’s going to be okay and that you’re strong you still feel as if your world has fallen to pieces.
The feeling of being told you’re no longer loved. You’re no longer wanted. You’re no longer the light of somebodies life. Is a one of the toughest things to hear. Once those words have left from your significant others mouth there is no going back. Your heart sinks. The lump in your throat starts to swell and the tears start rolling down your face. Then comes the heartbreak. Your heart aches along with every part of your body. Once they leave all you want to do is try and fix whatever it was that was wrong. You want to do anything to keep this person in your life. But once they’ve walked away. They’re just a part of your past. A memory. A memory that fades every day. The time after this is not easy.
Nobodies heartbreak is the same. Everybody deals differently to the emotion. Deleting everything of the relationship to pretend it never existed or the person ever existed. Finding quotes to try and fight the pain away. Keeping yourself busy is fundamentally the only way to stop yourself from overthinking. From overthinking all the reasons why. Why you wasn’t good enough, if you could of done anymore. The reasons just lay heavy on your heart just as much as the words “I’m sorry, it’s over.”
Everybody tries to comfort and console you but all you want is just a hug. Hearing words just makes you want to break down into tears. No matter what anyone tells you, you just feel so hurt and upset to even think you’ll be okay. Sometimes you feel numb to the pain, as if nothing happened. But someone can say just one word and it can just trigger the pain. Some people have said to get over someone is to get under someone else but when you’re hurting so much it doesn’t take the pain away.
When your heart is so heavy and hurting as much as it does it’s important to surround yourself with people who love you. Positive people. People that would do anything for you.
If you’ve not realised from this post I’m talking about myself. My heart has been broken and I’m trying to find Luke again. Blogging is my output and writing this has been the hardest thing, but writing it also is making me realise it won’t last forever. I had my heart broke last year and I soared. I flew so high I was a completely different person. A person that was happy and so content with where things were going. At the moment I’m not that person. I’m seeking approval in anything and everyone. Which is one of the things that hurts the most. I’ve felt so worthless.
However, last time I became a new Luke. I need to get back to that Luke. He was strong, he didn’t care, it took him time to heal but he didn’t let it get the better of him. It’s only been a couple of days, but I’m determined to make sure it doesn’t consume me. I’ve been keeping myself busy, meeting people and doing things that make me happy.
Happy Luke will return. But my blogging will not be hindered because of it. In fact it will be better than before. I will work harder and make sure I push boundaries. I can do this.