February is the month of Valentine. The month of showcasing love to the person you love the most. I’ve done a post and photoshoot showcasing that self love is okay. That instead of showcasing love to others, which you should be doing every day of the year, that it’s okay to love yourself.
I’ve now been single for over year and a half now and I must say the first part of being single really upset me. If something good happened I felt I had no-one to share it with. I had nothing to look forward too. I had nothing to keep me going through the week knowing I’d be seeing someone special at the weekend. Being able to cuddle up to someone. My phone not getting many notifications from not texting someone constantly. All these are things are things you miss when you’re alone.
Goodbye Dating Apps, Hello selfish Valentine
However, I’ve hit a point in my life that I’ve really felt I’ve needed. Something I’ve not had in a long time and that is acceptance. Acceptance of the fact that I’m single. The fact that I’m focusing on myself and that’s okay. With lots of exciting things starting to happen I feel I don’t need someone to make me happy. I don’t need someone to channel my happiness. Now that I finally understand that happiness isn’t defined by someone, this is when the true factor of working on myself begins.
Coming off dating apps has really helped with this, especially at this time of year with Valentine. The start of the new year I was finding myself just obsessed with constantly going on these apps and trying to find a guy to talk too. Since deleting them I’ve not worried about needing to speak to someone or finding myself searching for someone. They always say when you’re not looking for it, it comes to you. I can say I won’t stay off them forever because how in the hell will I try and get on the dating scene. But for now it’s best to stay off them and focus on myself after so many failed dates and 2 failed relationships.
I’m a wear your heart on your sleeve kind of boy. I’ve always fallen for people way too quickly. When in a relationship, I always love way too much. Which to some might been seen as a weakness, but to me I’m just a person who loves to express how much I love that person. Furthermore, being single is no different. I’ve tried to express to myself how much I should love myself. Showcasing my love in the form of my blog, my Instagram, my love for my friends and family. Photography. Working out. These are all contributions leading me to become a happier person and not relying on someone to make me happy.
Self Love Rules
- Delete all dating apps – These apps are nothing but trouble. Yes it’s a great way to meet people but it always ends up in tears. Once feelings get involved then you’ve had it. Stop trying to chase people that don’t want to give you their time. Don’t allow Valentines to get you down. It’s one time of the year!
- Focus on things you love – Channel your love into something you enjoy doing. For me its creating content as many of you know. I channel it into creating content for my instagram. Doing this gives you a different mindset and gives you something to dedicate your time too.
- Stop putting yourself down and letting others do the same – This is one I’m yet to master. Don’t put yourself down over things you can’t control. Don’t allow someone to make you feel so small and useless, because you’re not. You’re worth 100 times what they are and you will shine a lot brighter when you realise this.
- Take time to do more things with your friends and family – This is the most important one of all. Take time to do things with people that love you and what to spend time with you. They want to spend time with you, they are the people that deserve it. Even at Valentine, take your friend out for a meal?
- Treat yourself – Allow yourself to put yourself first. Buy yourself an outfit that you’ve been wanting to get for a while. You’ll be amazed and what an amazing outfit does to your confidence. If not clothes buy yourself you’ve wanted for a long time.